Lack of Comic

This is not a comic. This is the lack of a comic, and I apologize for it.

It's been spring break, and now I'm baking cookies in an attempt to forget about my impending thesis deadlines.

On the plus side, my thesis is going pretty well.

Research Time

Excerpt from "The Wedding of Sir Gawain and Dame Ragnelle". True story. Arthur and Gawain ride out to ask every single person they meet the question, "What do women want most?" and write down the answer in these huge tomes. Then they meet up and compare answers. A true bromance if I ever saw one. I can just imagine them in a frat house somewhere asking the question, "Dude, what do the chicks want us to say?"

Petty Percy

He may have been a Romantic, but Shelley had a long way to go in the wooing department.

Independent Study

Dinner at the Frankenstein household is, frankly, just odd.

And they made grete and awesome noyse

Malory always seems like a gleeful child to me when he writes battle scenes. I find him utterly impossible to take seriously, until everyone dies.

Also, I keep meaning to write a comic about something besides medieval (and occasionally Renaissance) literature just to show you that I study other things. Then again, it's difficult to make funny doodles about statistics.

First Impressions Last the Longest

Sir Gareth, ever humble, ever patient, ever kick-ass awesome, can't seem to catch a break--from anyone. His whole book is basically a tale straight out of Ye Olde Medieval High School Movie. Teased and bullied by Sir Kay the Ever Block-headed and ignored by pretty much everyone else, he finally gets a chance to hang around the cool/popular Table at feast time, only to find out that he is wearing an outfit that is so last century. If surcoats are 'fetch,' his kitchen boy tunic is 'roll over and play dead.' But nevertheless, he gets his chance: a quest! (read: possible date to the junior prom). There Gareth is, running rings around all the other guys (actually, running them through), proving again and again (and again and again) that he's better than any jock in the whole school district, and yet the only person whose opinion seems to matter is the girl's (Lynnet)--who wants absolutely nothing to do with a guy who wears that. Meanwhile, Lyonesse (enter Taylor Swift a la "You Belong with Me") couldn't care less what her white knight is wearing--she just can't wait to get the hell out of this dungeon and out into the 'real world.'

Fig Leaf Epidemic

It turns out that Victorian men were really just afraid that they couldn't measure up to the badassery of naked Greek warriors.

Literary Figures We Don't Take Seriously, Part Six Zillion and One

From Thomas Malory's Le Morte Darthur: "So with this there came a knight riding all armed on a great horse and took the lady away with force with him, and ever she cried and made great dole. So when she was gone the King was glad, for she made such a noise."

My, these olden-times dudes are douches. I tend to think of Arthur as kind of a harmless batty man and therefore give him a little more leeway than, say, Hamlet. But really. I mean, there is a lady being carried away against her will in front of his eyes and all he can say is that he's glad she's gone because she made too much noise.

For the record, the file name I saved this comic under is "Arthur is dumb, part 1 billion".

Also, for the record, I did not want to use Sir Awesome for this comic because carrying off ladies is not an awesome thing to do, but my attempt at drawing a new horse looked like an anteater. So I gave up and used Sir Awesome and his horse and his pennant instead.